|Hope, Promise, Potential...all in a tiny flower|
Writing that yesterday was a hard day seems like an understatement. I cried... or rather had a meltdown in front of three other faculty members and an executive secretary. They were all incredibly supportive and thankfully my work BFF and had lunch plans (lunch plans that take some serious scheduling to work but it worked) and she was there to rescue me. I felt lost and hopeless; I hated everything about work which isn’t anywhere close to being true but that’s how I felt yesterday... But when I arrived home, I discovered that my wedding pumpkin patch had yet another female flower along with some male flowers. There were bees buzzing around this plant that has three beautiful pumpkins. I whispered, "Nature never did betray the heart that loved her", a line from my favorite poem, “Lines Composed a Few Miles above Tintern Abbey” by William Wordsworth. Within a few moments, my day had already gotten better.
Then my “pit crew” came home… that would be my fella. That man gets up at 4:30am to make me breakfast and coffee every single day. While I put together my lunches on the weekend, each morning he packs my lunch bag with icy coolers and utensils. He basically gets me out of the house on time without having mornings where I’m running late and have to skip coffee. Bless his heart. We often say that in the South as a phrase meaning someone isn’t so bright but when I write it here, I mean it. He is the kindest, most thoughtful human I have ever met; when he tells me that we’re (WE’RE) going to get through this year together, I believe him.
So here are our babies who are currently still on the vine. They still seem to be growing and they’re terribly healthy and happy pumpkins. I tell them that I love them and how magical they are.
Sometimes I have no idea how I have been so blessed with a wonderful fella (finally!), some really supportive and amazing colleague-friends, and some of you amazing blog readers who have become very dear, supportive friends to me. Some folks don’t believe that cyber-relationships ever work. If you’re my age or simply in this awesome Gothy scene, you may have had pen pals like I did. I wrote friends I had only met once; I wrote friends I had never met in person. I wrote one guy named John in Guernsey for years. I wonder what ever happened to him. We met once when his family was on holiday in Florida of all places. Sometimes I miss pen pals but sometimes I thinking blogging simply took the place of that and then feel perfectly okay about it.
Oh, so another awesome thing about my fella and about friends overseas… the lovely Ms Misantropia over at the self-titled blog is hosting a bit of a Halloween gift swap. This was a bit of a Facebook friend event so I hope she doesn’t give me the stink eye for mentioning it. Anyhow, our gift items needed to be sent out this week which really meant that on Saturday I needed to have my box in the mail. I opted to send out a few international trick-or-treats to some of my close buddies (and new friends) but BAM! the UPS store wouldn’t ship international without phone numbers and then BAM! the U.S. Post Office had already closed. My fella was the one who took the packages to the post office on Monday and completed all the international custom labels just so that all of my boxes would be where they needed to be before Halloween. He didn’t ask any questions or complain about the outrageous shipping costs… which makes me also want to note that do you ever feel like our countries don’t want us to be friends?!?! Oy!
So this is become tangential but for all of you who commented, sent messages, and texts of support… THANK YOU! It meant the world to me. This, too, shall pass. Having some amazing peeps from around the world sayin’, “You got this!” makes it that much nicer.
I leave you with my pumpkin patch... it became my metaphor. On first glance, it looks dead and a bit rough around the edges. That's exactly how I was feeling about my job. But, if you look closer you will find new growth, three lovely pumpkins, flowers, and bees. That's also part of the metaphor of my job. I love that place. I really, truly do. Sometimes what looks bad really has some hidden blessings.